pick up the pieces

it's weird how you realize things every day. i can't figure out whether or not you remember them all, but either way, you are constantly realizing things.
see, my dad has a unique way of looking at mistakes. everyone does dumb things right? everyone does things they regret? well, there really isn't anything in this world that is completely impossible to get beyond, someway, somehow. and what really comes out of it in the end is that you learn something along the way, making you a stronger, and probably better person by enduring the healing process.

i have a habit of dwelling on things but i'm trying to pick up this attitude of my dad's to the best of my ability because i think it's really healthy.

it's tough though because at times life really does suck. i hate to be one of those people who hangs their head and whines about how bad they have it because in all actuality, i really don't at all. but life really is tough. people are cruel and unpredictable. and the world can be really cold sometimes. i know better than to have a bad attitude but that's easier than it seems, unfortunately.

so, all of this was brought on by a visit with an old cd, ben folds rockin' the subarbs... these lines hit me

and life barrels on like a runaway trainwhere the passengers change
they don't change anything
they get off, someone else can get on

sad lines, sad song... sad message.

i guess it sucks to say, but the fact of the matter is that you can only tell yourself how great life is so many times because it isn't always great. believing that is blinding yourself. but, what it comes down to is that even though life sucks sometimes, and even though you kinda want to sit back and just let it kick your ass, you've got to put up a fight.

like the sign in my bathroom in california said, "I get up. I walk. I fall down. Meanwhile, I keep dancing."