exhausting

ever just feel like you're trying to hard? and you're exhausting all of your efforts into something that one day you have the perspective enough to realize...will never be.
Or totally dedicating yourself to people who just do not seem to return the favor...and even worse do not seem to really care.
I guess I hate feeling disappointed, who doesn't? But it's worse when you really put your whole heart into a relationship with a person--and by relationship I mean any, a relative, a friend, a significant other--and realize far too late that you were giving 150%, and they were giving about 10. That whole time.

What a waste of time and energy.

And maybe I shouldn't look at it that way. I mean, I guess you come out being the better, bigger person, but there's only so many times you can reassure yourself with that fact. And only so many times you can accept it as enough in return.

Maybe the solution is to just lower your expectation of others--don't set yourself up to be impressed, and you won't be let down. I don't know, but whatever I've been doing for the past 24 years can't be right. People either need to start caring, or I need to stop.